Leading in Temptation and Not Tempting My Family

"No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it".

1 Corinthians 10:13

Do you ask yourself, 'what's the good of temptation'?

Oswald Chambers explains that the word 'temptation' has come down in the world; we are apt to use it wrongly. He says, "temptation is not sin, it is the thing we are bound to meet if we are men".

So many times as a husband, father, brother, son, son-in-law etc... I am tempted. I am tempted to be self absorbed. I am tempted to put my needs before others. I am tempted to want my way and not consider how my choice will effect others. It is a real battle. God's Word is such an encouragement to me knowing He will not allow me to be tempted beyond what I can bear. What a wonderful truth to live out, not just mention!

Let me share with you another area that I have recently been considering. It's not only how I am being tempted, but how I can tempt others to sin.

Have you ever considered how you are able to tempt others to sin?

Here are some ways I have discovered that I can tempt my family to sin. I can tempt my family to sin by my actions or lack of actions. I can do this by my tone of voice. Am I yelling, being harsh, patronizing in the way I speak to them or question them? If I am, I need to change this behaviour. It is not serving

In my role, I am tempted in many ways. However God has entrusted me to lead my family. I must consider how I am tempting my family.

I am so grateful that during these times I can run to the Gospel and remind myself of His great saving power! It is in these times I am provided with an opportunity to rehearse the Gospel. For it is the power of salvation to all who believe.

I trust you will consider how you are serving your family when you are being tempted. Are you being tempted to sin? Are you tempting others to sin? Remind yourself of the Gospel of Jesus Christ...

Blogging with an eternal perspective....

Q. Is blog viewing, being done with an eternal perspective?

A. I hope so!

Husbands/Fathers - have you noticed what your wife is reading on blogs or posting on other peoples blogs? I'm not sure about you - but I am shocked!!!

As a husband, I have noticed that my wife can spend a lot of time on other peoples blogs investigating their arguments or positions on a certain topic. Damaging? No! Concerning? Not always. Yet I do have a desire to lead and encourage my wife as she reads other peoples blogs and to ask questions as she does so: "Is this helping her or is it causing her discouragement?" "Is it causing her to be judgmental & critical?" "Are these blogs provoking her to view life through Cross-centered lenses?" "Or is she being tempted to engage in philosophical ideas or 'worldly' views because a 'respectable' 'christian' lady has presented a good case based on worldly wisdom?"

Look carefully at those whose blogs your wife is frequenting. A good place to start, after reading what the blogger themselves writes, is to look at what other websites they link to and what other blogs they recommend. This can often give you a good insight into what thoughts and ideas they also subscribe to, and what is important to them. We all know, it's very easy to sit behind a key board and type our views in - but what is the writers character like? What is their life like? Are they just throwing words around carelessly? Do they think of the consequences to the reader who may be reading their random thoughts? How are they serving their sisters in Christ?

As I have read comments from others on some of these blogs, who have read the posts from those who blog various thoughts and arguments, it has also seemed to highlight both the misguided views of many who subscribe to a worldly wisdom instead of starting with a Biblical framework. Obviously we have many and varied points of view on many topics, however we should never be swayed (or encourage our wives to be) by worldly wisdom that is based on culture and philosophy, rather than God's Word.

A few final thoughts - if your wife appears to be spending more time engrossed at the computer reading blogs, sending and receiving emails, using Facebook or surfing the Internet than she is spending time in the Word, then maybe it is time to ask some tough questions. Where is her heart gaining food from - the Internet or from the Lord?

Now don't get me wrong, there are many helpful blogs and websites with a whole range of things from encouraging blogs, Godly or thought provoking articles, all manner of 'how-to' pages and information galore, not to mention the convenience of communication via things like Facebook and email, all of which my wife and I use. However, if these things draw you away from time with the Lord, time with your family, productive work or study time, time in the community (with real life people!) or much needed sleep, then it is time to reassess your priorities... something we did around our dinner table last night, with both my wife and I having to admit that we have been wasting way too much time on the computer of late and that we needed to change our computer habits.

One last thing to consider is how our time may be better spent - perhaps we ought to move away from the computer and get involved in community. Serving each other who are struggling with not having children, having 8 children? Perhaps even visiting the elderly or hospitalised? Perhaps we could encourage our wife to be looking for evidences of grace in others and encourage them in the race that they have set before them? Not everyone is running the same race... and we can be offering cold cups of water in Jesus' name!

Husbands - I think it is important that we lead our wife (& children) in the way she (they) reads blogs or website articles, as well as how she spends her time. I would encourage you to site down with your wife and ask her what she is reading and how she processes that information. Not to be her 'overseer' or 'big brother', but out of love and care for her heart and what she is being fed. I recommend we ought to be reading & writing with an eternal perspective...

D - A - D

Yesterday was father's day in Australia. I was asked to present a 5 minute talk about fathers and father's day. I took the opportunity to challenge the men to give a gift to their children this father's day.

The gift I recommended, was that they love their children s mum.

How do they do that?

D = Draw
A = Affirm
D = Do

D = Draw out your wife... How? - Ask alot of questions: How was your day? What is the Lord teaching you? Are you OK? Is there anything you want to talk to me about? Am I upsetting you or the children? Have you watched anything today or listened to anything today that has distrubed you or challenged you?

A = Affirm your wife... - Unashamedly, often, loudly, proudly, openly & in front of the children! Have you succumb to the condition of taking your wife for granted? Dishes done, clean clothes, meals cooked, kids scheduled, bed made, house clean & the like? So often our wife has done many things that go unnoticed and unappreciated. If we don't affirm our wife for the things they have done, will our children?

Another thing we need to affirm is when our wife makes choices to serve Christ instead of serving themselves. This needs to be done loudest.

D = Do things for your wife... - When I was preparing this little talk, I was talking to my wife about the "do" word and asking Meg, what sort of things should I suggest? She said, "look honey, men have "needs" right"? She continued, "wife's get tired but might have more strength to meet needs if husbands helped out a bit more"... My first question was, "what can I do for you"!

The best gift fathers can give their children - is to love their children s mum...