Teaching Children about Priorities

Training children can be tricky. Especially when things happen that are outside of our control. However it is so important that we walk/lead our children through these times to give them the skills and understanding that they need, when facing disappointment or hurt. I find these times to be strategic for imparting wisdom.

Tonight, my eldest son has once again faced disappointment. His soccer game has been canceled for the 3rd time this season. Now he really, really, really enjoys playing sport. I think he has been so blessed by God to have been put on the team that he is. His coach is fantastic, his team members have been very accepting and welcoming. This has really been a wonderful experience for Caleb so far.

Now with all these game cancellations, there are going to be re-matches. But we have just learnt that these rematches are going to be held on Sundays. In fact the first rematch is on a Sunday Morning at 9:00 AM. But this is the time that we are at Church. So what do we do?

A very wise man once told me that "priorities precede privileges". Man I have banked that quote and I repeat it often. It is a gold nugget. Because it is so true!!!

So what are our priorities as a believer in Jesus Christ? It is the meeting together of the saints. Sure, there are exceptions and the like, but how quickly our priorities become confused. It is important to keep your priorities your priorities.

Anyway, we knew what we should do, but how do we teach and train our son, so as not to provoke and frustrate him. Instead to teach him and encourage him in godliness?

My wife and I spoke to our son and told him about the decision that we face, and asked his thoughts on the matter. He was quick to recognize the struggle but admitted the right thing to do was not play at that time.

A few days later we were on our way to soccer practice, and I asked my son what he would say to his friends when they asked if he was going to make it to the rematch games. I was so shocked I was silenced. He said, "I'm going to say that I won't make it to those games because I am a Christian and I will be at Church."

My usual sensor picks up the tone of how it is said, and the facial expression that accompany the words. To my delight, the tone was humble and passionate, and the face was serious and committed. I think I said, "Wow son, that is really awesome you feel that way."

So, back to my question, "how do you teach your children to deal with disappointment?"

Brothers, it is as simple as teaching your children what God's Word instructs us. "You, your children and grandchildren must respect the Lord your God. You must do this as long as you live. Obey all his rules and commands I give you. Then you will live a long time." (Deuteronomy 6:2)

Further down, we read, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul and strength." Now this is not just taught orally, but by your actions along with your wife's actions.

Do you model for your children what it is to, "love the Lord God with all your heart, soul and strength?" Oh, I have struggled at doing this, but I think it is important to model for your children what it means to love the Lord your God. That means, not allowing other things to creep in and confuse your privileges over your priorities.

Now my wife and I normally let our children express their disappointment, as long as it is done with respect, and not out of a heart of grumbling against God or others. Depending on location and timming we take the opportunity to help them see the sinfulness of their hearts, and identify where we have struggled with this sin as well. We then encourage them to repent of this sin and will pray with and for them. Then after we have cried and got it all out, we focus on our hope, HEAVEN! Being in God's presence, where He is!

I hope you will walk/lead your child(ren) through their disappointments! Leading them straight to the cross of Christ!